Dear Ones,
It’s been a very long time since I wrote a letter to you all. As I promised initially, the format for Letters From Home wasn’t intended to be a regularly published ‘newsletter’ so much as an avenue in which the Omaha pilot group disciples could communicate with the world wide disciples whenever our Heavenly Father had laid anything on our hearts. And today, I have such a topic… brokenness and its paramount importance in the lives of disciples.
We have clear, Biblical examples of what brokenness looks like and doesn’t just by looking at the lives of Saul, David and Absalom. In Gene Edwards’ book, A Tale of Three Kings, A Study in Brokenness, he writes in parable style about King Saul, King David and King Absalom. I highly recommend this book and have read and reread it for many years now. It’s been especially helpful to me during the times I’m convinced I’m seeing a ‘Saul’ or an ‘Absalom’ operating in someone else (which, of course, is never my business to try to discern – it’s the Lord alone who can discern the thoughts and intents of the human heart). The beautiful portrayal of David’s brokenness in this book always brings me back to the gut wrenching realization that once again, I’ve got my nose in God’s business. And once again, I must repent. And again, He willingly forgives. What a faithful Father He is!
We humans have often (always?) had a tendency to see ‘broken’ as something bad and to be avoided – something that makes its object worthless and no longer of any use. But what if we looked at broken through a different paradigm? What if we saw it as good, desirable, and absolutely necessary in the process of making disciples? It really is. You see, we don’t know our own hearts. We can’t always see the remaining selfishness that’s often hidden deep down in the depths of our souls. But God can, and He knows the damage it continues to do in our lives and relationships. And that’s why, in His perfect and unfailing faithfulness, He will continue to draw us into a place where we are willing to let Him excise it from us.
It might help if we step aside for a moment to consider an image of broken and mended pottery. There is a technique called Kintsukuroi or Kintsugi, the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery with seams of gold or other precious metals, thereby making the object even more beautiful for being broken.
I found examples on line and especially liked this one because the gold filling seems to resemble the Hebrew letter Shin( שּ ). But you see it, don’t you? What was once plain and simple now appears adorned. And so it is with us. We become adorned with more of our Lord’s beauty and holiness each time we are broken and repaired by His tender, healing hand.
Make no mistake – being broken is not an easy or quick process. There is pain, heartache, disappointment, loneliness, and many other discomforts associated with the process. But it’s still our only hope in continuing to be molded and shaped into the image and likeness of our Beloved Bridegroom. When we are willing to allow the Holy Spirit to show us the true state of our heart, and then fall before Him in repentance… when we are willing to seek His face and be humbled by His Grace and Majesty… we are more and more able to see the true and ugly awfulness of our sins and our absolute need for cleansing.
Listen with your heart of hearts to our brother David’s cry in Psalm 51:
“Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot outmy transgressions. Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight; so you are right in your verdict and justified when you judge. Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me. Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb; you taught me wisdom in that secret place. Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones you have crushed rejoice. Hide your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquity. Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. Then I will teach transgressors your ways, so that sinners will turn back to you. Deliver me from the guilt of bloodshed, O God, you who are God my Savior, and my tongue will sing of your righteousness. Open my lips, Lord, and my mouth will declare your praise. You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise.” (Psalm 51:1-17 NIV)
Beloved fellow disciples, this is the kind of brokenness we need. This is the kind of total and utter dependence we must have as we look to our God to meet our every need. This is the kind of transparency we can afford to have with our God. If we truly want to reflect Him as He really is, then it’s of paramount importance that we be broken. Our brokenness is what removes any competition to what the Holy Spirit wants to do in us, to us and through us as we seek to be salt and light in the midst of those with whom we live, work and have relationship.
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.” (Hebrews 12:1-2 NIV)
I am incredibly blessed to be on this journey of discipleship together with you and my prayer is that He will find us all faithful, no matter what we face here on earth.
Always for His glory,
Your sister, Nancy